Thursday, June 5, 2014

Decision Day

I made a decision this week.  I am committing to pushing myself a bit to live outside my comfort zone in social settings. I am moving forward to finding a new balance that will incorporate solitary presence and social interaction.

Often in my life I have felt like an outsider in social gatherings.  Over time, I have found myself avoiding gatherings and learned to find my comfort in solitary settings, often surrounded by nature.  I have watched others seemingly feeling competent and a part of a larger social network and activities while I longed to feel part of the social network.

I have vacillated between running towards experiencing all that life has to offer and sitting back watching it roll bye like a silent movie playing out before my eyes.  I have at moments allowed myself to become spectator watching all life's events playing out in others lives rather than playing out my own movie.  My own feeling of inadequacy lead to procrastination until I could feel more competent to author my own script.

I have often withdrawn from social settings partly due to feelings of inadequacy but also due to my failing to engage in social settings.   But I also miss at times social interaction and connection with others.

So I am officially joining an organization that combines my love of nature and social gatherings.   I am becoming an  official Sister on the Fly.  I won't be an outsider but rather I am making a choice to be an insider.  I will make choices about where I get together and when and I will also chose to gather my strength from solitary or from new friends.



This weekend is my first meet up with other Sisters on the Fly.
   

With the motto of  "We have more Fun than Anyone", who can go wrong!
  

16 comments:

  1. I have read about Sisters on the Fly and from reading your blog I think that is a good fit. I also understand completely where you are coming from! My husband is a complete social butterfly, however I have never been even close and I often run from social events. A trick I learned, take a second and open up your heart that everyone wants to talk to you and say Hi first! My husband says I have grown much socially, although he has no idea what it takes for me to jump in and talk! I So hope this Sisters on The Fly brings a happy balance to your life!

    Maura

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  2. I, too, find that I have to push myself to be open to new social situations but most of the time it's been worth it. Sisters on the Fly looks like such a fun group! Enjoy your weekend. :-)

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  3. Thanks Maura, I have come to believe, that our outsiders rarely match our insides. What would happen if we were more 'real' about how we really feel. May be there are more of us who don't feel like we really fit in...
    Karen, I am anxious to meet some new friends and have fun.

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    1. I truly believe some of us are born shy..and we take any slight 'failure' in life as confirmation that we don't fit in! Ha Ha..What if we were more real? No one else would notice, but we would cringe and hide under the bed sheets! Maybe we could start "Misfits on the Fly" LOL!

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    2. Peter.... I hope you will read my comment below. I urge you to give up the idea of being "born shy." Shyness is a defect. Being a loner, on the other hand, is a positive attribute and a delight. I know you're just kidding, but I've known a lot of loners who are not shy and who are not serial killers either! Haha!

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  4. I have often thought of joining that group, but I don't have a cute trailer like most of the members. Enjoy! and be sure to tell us all about it.

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  5. I have been a member of SOTF for about five years. I have had so many wonderful situations and met lots of wonderful women. Welcome and "jump in". You can enjoy your solitary time too.....just play according to your "comfort" zone! Hope to see you along the way! Gingersnap

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  6. Fabulous...loved that book and thought it would be so fun!!! You'll fit right in....and love it I'm bettng!! And make some wonderful friendships...very cool!!

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  7. So glad to have you along and the journey. Joining Sisters on the Fly is one of the best things I have ever done for myself. I look forward to sitting around a campfire with you! #2301

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  8. Karen, funny I thought you were already a Sister. Welcome! I love my sister time and love my early mornings of solitude in my camper. Best thing I ever did for myself #2987

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  9. What a great group that is. I'm not much of a joiner. Although I am outgoing in social situations, I find them draining and need to be alone to recoup. But if I qualified, that's a group I would join. Good for you. Can't wait to see all about it.

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  10. I am so proud of you . . . it takes strength to make changes. I'll be looking forward to hearing about your first camp out. Have fun! Your blogging sister, Connie :)

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  11. Great post. I had wanted to join for a long time. but I always go off in the wrong direction for some reason. If Teri comes back to read she should know that some of the ladies have scamps, motor homes etc.
    Karen have lots of fun with these ladies I know you will enjoy being a part of the group.

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  12. That's wonderful, good for you! That seems such a fun group of women, I'll bet it will be a good experience. I think a lot of us solo RVing women are basically shy or reclusive - or at least more than normal. Nothing wrong with that. Sometimes I LOVE being alone and doing my own thing without anyone bugging me. Other times I LOVE being part of a group that's social, or having company over, or visiting someone. We can do it all if we want. I can't wait to hear how the weekend went. :)

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  13. Hi, klbexplores!

    I hope you enjoy Sisters On The Fly and have lots of great experiences!

    In case you still find yourself uncomfortable participating in the group activities, please do not take that as an inadequacy on your part. You may have a loner personality. If so, it's not something to be ashamed of. Loners are often thought of being deficient in some way... We often are called shy which implies a personality problem. We are not shy We are happiest when alone. I consider it a gift to be this way.

    Thought I'd toss that in. . . I do hope you enjoy yourself with the "sisters." I admire you for trying something new!

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