Often in my life I have felt like an outsider in social gatherings. Over time, I have found myself avoiding gatherings and learned to find my comfort in solitary settings, often surrounded by nature. I have watched others seemingly feeling competent and a part of a larger social network and activities while I longed to feel part of the social network.
I have vacillated between running towards experiencing all that life has to offer and sitting back watching it roll bye like a silent movie playing out before my eyes. I have at moments allowed myself to become spectator watching all life's events playing out in others lives rather than playing out my own movie. My own feeling of inadequacy lead to procrastination until I could feel more competent to author my own script.
I have often withdrawn from social settings partly due to feelings of inadequacy but also due to my failing to engage in social settings. But I also miss at times social interaction and connection with others.
So I am officially joining an organization that combines my love of nature and social gatherings. I am becoming an official Sister on the Fly. I won't be an outsider but rather I am making a choice to be an insider. I will make choices about where I get together and when and I will also chose to gather my strength from solitary or from new friends.
This weekend is my first meet up with other Sisters on the Fly.