I admit it..... I'm in a major FUNK!

I've been working on getting my house and yard and life in order.  But I will admit it, it is a half hearted effort.   I am in a major funk!!  

This year with so much rain the yard has become a jungle and it alone is a full time job.  The garden has gone to pot.   And there is the house..... and the animals.....  and the decisions.
                                                         Calgon  take me away!

 It is not that I am regretting my decision to down size and full time.  I am excited to move to the next phase of my life.   But realistically, I find myself beginning to grieve the loss of my present life.   I have been a mom and foster parent for all of my adult life.  Here I am, in my sixties and I am wanting to do some exploring, visiting, and just plain wanting to redefine myself for this latter part of my life.  Even if I weren't going to move to full time traveling, I would need to downsize from where I live now.  The work, the house,  the property,  the animals.... it is just too much for me to keep up with.

Is it selfish of me to want it all????  The reality is I can't afford it all.
I have to make a choice.


So I've decided to full-time for a while and see where that leads me.  I may find I need to have a home base, only time will tell.   There are lots of ways folks have made life work for them once they are open to the idea of change.  And I have 2 daughters and my Auntie here in Spokane, which has for the most of my life been home.   I also have a daughter and her family in Connecticut. I also have so many places to see and experience that it is hard to know where I will hang my hat.

I have read many blogs that talked of the relief as  you let go of things and move towards the future.  Did everyone skip over the hard parts?  Or were they to hard to write about?  Or did  you just think no one would want to know the nitty gritty details?   And then there are all the decisions!  Geezs... these are the times I would love to push of some of these decisions for someone else to make. 



Ok Ok . One foot in front of another.... Tomorrow is another day.
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.  Today.

Here's  To
           My Future:

            

       

Ok Kids.....  How did you get through the tough times?

                          I need some encouragement here......

Nurture Love Today

Who can help but be haunted by the news from Colorado.  Each one of us finds their own way to deal with unexplainable tragedy.  In a blog I follow, at Box Canyon Blog,
( http://boxcanyonblog.blogspot.com/2012/07/sunrise-sunset.html)
the author writes  of the unimaginable tragedy in Colorado this week.
It started me thinking....

There is so much hurt and evil in the world.  We will never really know what causes an individual to view their world in such a negative and brutal way.  Yet if we just turn away..... do nothing...... it allows the evil to continue.

I have been a foster parent for 38 years.  I have seen wounded and hurt children and teens who have seen very little kindness yet, grow into loving and caring adults while others continue the pattern of hate into their own lives and the lives of others who they touch.  Mental illness is real and it touches an individuals' life and the lives of all the people who know and love them in a profound way.  

 I can not tell you the countless number of times that I have heard said " I don't know how you do what you do, I could never do it".  Not every one needs to be a foster parent.  People who tell of pivotal people in their lives, remark about the teacher, the coach, the family member, or neighbor who saw the potenial in them and nurtured it.  They took time and gave this young person something to believe in.  The young people of today are the future of tomorrow.

I cannot presume to know what every injured or tormented soul needs.  I have learned to extend a moment of kindness, a caring comment or an encouraging word.  No kindness is wasted. The funny thing is when we do something that matters, we often find we receive more than the intended recipient.   Every one can do something. 

There also comes a time to heal your own broken heart.  For me, healing often comes surrounded by nature.  Who cannot behold the beauty of a stunning sunrise and not have hope for the future.   Who cannot witness the beauty of the rose and not be aware of it's thorns.

                                           

                                          Nurture Love today!

A Biking Milestone

My kiddo mastered riding his bike this week. He had such a fear of falling that he wouldn't allow himself to pedal fast enough to gain balance. We have been working on riding his bike for 3 years.   I kept telling him.... if you only pedal faster you will take off and wonder what was so hard.  He kept trying..... I kept pleading.

HE DID IT!!!

He took off and went on down the trail and came riding back with a big grin!  "You were right! You were right!  I don't know what was so hard!" 

He finally got it and he is raring to go, so to celebrate, we went on a five mile ride on the Centennial River Trail. It was a hot ride but we went in the evening so it was doable. He loved it....

                                 

                                                              we found a huge pine tree....

 up...
              up....
                                up.....

  It was a six bunny ride, but we couldn't interest any 

bunnies in posing for a picture! 

  There are miles and miles of trails available in our area so that will keep us busy this summer.  I hope it is not the last time I am 'right' in his eyes!

It was a good day!

     

A Cool trip down Memory Lane

Today is going to be hot, hot, hot!  Could be over 100 today, a good day for a dip in a lake or river.  Our favorite place to swim is the river above a small dam which makes a great beach and quiet swimming area.  However this year the dam spill ways are still open since we have had so much rain and runoff from the mountains.  

So, I'm taking a trip down memory lane.  To a cool trip I took a few years ago.  Every adventurous person I know has taken a river rafting trip and it definitely was on my bucket list.  So I talked a friend into going with me to Montana to the Clark Fork River.  I kayak so I thought it would similar, however the stroke of the paddle is different.  I spent the first half of the trip unlearning my kayak stroke.  Fortunately, the first part of the trip was mild so I had time to adjust and get comfortable paddling .   So of course we bought the pictures to document the trip.

Getting the feeling of rowing

We had an older lady on her first trip (in the middle on the left).... every time we hit a bump she feel into the middle of the boat.  On one such bump she nearly went overboard.  Thank goodness for the life vests, I grabbed her vest and she plunked into the middle, again.  But at least we didn't have to fish her out of the river.  I am in the back of the boat on the right in front of our boats captain.

Everyone got cooled off here!

It was a very hot day so the water felt shockingly refreshing. There is nothing like a dip in cool water.  So of course I have pictures to document my trip.  So this is my cool memory on a hot day. 

So do you have white water memories?

I think this afternoon we will go on a scouting trip to find a cool place for a dip